When I was taught the roles of an addictive family system, I easily spotted my place in the lineup. Can you say over-achiever? Master problem solver of other people’s issues? Guilty on all counts.
Feeling responsible for a lot of people and things that were never mine to feel or think or do anything about was a real joy killer. I brought all this over-achieving and people pleasing quite naturally and unconsciously into my life with God. I had all sorts of unconscious inclinations about how much God would expect of me and how little he would offer in return. Basically, I had the whole God/me thing backwards. But I also had his word, which I love to read and study and try to apply. Here’s a verse that gets me every time right in the heart:
Heaven’s my throne, earth is my footstool.
What sort of house could you build me?
What holiday spot reserve for me?
I made all this!
I own all this!
But there IS something I’m looking for:
A person simple and plain, reverently response to what I say.
Isaiah 66:1-2, The Message
So here’s the deal. God is not asking me to over-achieve so that he can under-deliver. He just wants to have a conversation with me from a particular way of thinking about the relationship - he wants it to be non-defensive. He desires relationship with me to be responsive on my part. Trusting. No fancy offerings or sacrifices, nothing showy. Just me showing up for relationship with him. That’s amazing.
God is not hungry, angry, lonely, tired, neurotic, needy, or insecure. He is God. He is Big. He is crazy about me and wants to chat. My job is to show up. To believe God is who he says he is and to think about that in my daily walking-about life. This is a foundational truth upon which we can build a resilient life.