Another component of resilience is the capacity to be flexible. This is also key for emotional adjustment and maturity. Rigidity is not good for us. I understand this because I read a lot of true crime books and of course, binge watch Criminal Minds like it is a part time job. The really psychopathic demons on those shows inevitably are compulsive neat freaks. I am not suggesting that excessively neat people are serial killers but extreme rigidity is problematic! The capacity to be flexible in terms of how we think, what we do, and even our core beliefs create the strength within us to have more resilience than the guy who demands precision and a rigid routine as a lifestyle choice.
Don’t buy the serial killer idea? Ok, I can be FLEXIBLE.
Did you know that research indicates that folks who have messy offices tend to be more creative and better problem solvers than someone whose desk is arranged with military precision?
The promises of AA and the program itself asks participants to dare to believe that their whole attitude and outlook on life will change. They expect and validate the concept of service to others. They talk about giving away what you have in order to keep what you received (meaning the gift of sobriety) through sharing experiences, strength and hope. This is often in the form of “12 stepping” and it involves going to help fellow sufferers in their time of need. This is difficult and usually inconvenient work. I have found that overdoses and rough landings on “bottoms” rarely occur during office hours. This requires massive amounts of flexibility but lest we forget, it holds the promise of a better life for those who practice this service work.
How is your flexibility? Are you able to bend your preferences to a higher power? Can you go with the flow? Or do others find you difficult?