Just Bloom…
A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms.
When I was younger I thought my competitive nature was a strength. It gave me grit and determination. Anytime someone told me I could NOT, I found an inclination to DO IT. There were some benefits to this, although each battle to DO this thing, whatever it was, that went against the grain of cultural norms took its toll. No big deal - this is life.
At my advanced age of 65, my perspective is changing. Maybe that’s developmentally appropriate, I do not know. But I still FEEL that competitive drive. I STILL want to beat my husband at tennis. I can win some games, but I have never won a set off him. I really, really want to beat him. This is not going to happen. I couldn’t do it a couple of years ago when he basically had a right arm that did not function properly - and he’s right-handed. My heart races at the thought of pulling off a victory.
I see a similar drive in my grandson. He wants to run the fastest, jump the highest, win all the games. I get it, I really do. But as I review my life, I have come to the conclusion that this push to do what others tell me I cannot has not always been beneficial. In fact, it has come with a pretty high price tag at times.
Because I am still a science nerd, I came across this perspective on competition from a biological perspective:
Competition is a negative interaction that occurs among organisms whenever two or more organisms require the same limited resource… Therefore, competitors reduce each other’s growth, reproduction, or survival.
(Source: www.biologyreference.com/Ce-Co/Competition.html#ixzz3xK2cfjuj)
Competition is part of the American ethos. I see adults with particular sport team allegiances acting like their friends who cheer for different teams are their arch enemy! I watch people compete for parking spaces (back in the day when we went outside) as if having to walk a few extra feet would kill them. Don’t even get me started on the competitive nature of politics! Our culturally encouraged, often primal urge to compete is reducing us.
What are we going to do about it?
